I don’t know how to roller skate, or I haven’t skated in years.
Do you really think over 10,000 women world-wide have been hanging around the rinks and skating since they were kids? No way! The majority of the women who are Bruisers haven’t skated (if at all) since their childhood skating birthday party or school skate. Good news! We will teach you how to skate! Starting from the basic fundamentals (stride, crossovers, balance, stopping) to mastering skills needed for roller derby (falls,
hits, blocking, maneuvering, etc.) Come, let us show you!
I’m too old.
Says who? There’s only a cap on being too young, not too old (must be 21 to play) - if you want it, you can have it! Lace up those skates ole’ girl! We’ve had a skater who was 48 play our first season, so bring it!
I’m scared I will get hurt.
Girl! Don’t be scurred! Although injuries do happen, we care about the safety of ourselves and each other, and train several hours to prepare our bodies to be conditioned for this sport. You will never fall and get up (over and over again) as much you do in derby, but it’s all about muscle memory and safety. In addition, we mandate everyone wear plenty of protective gear such as wrist guards, elbow and knee pads, helmet and mouth guard. There are also options such as bum savers and chin guards. Remember, safety is sexy! We won’t put you out there on the track, until we are confident you are safe and ready!
I’m too big, or I’m too little.
Again, says who? One of the beautiful things about roller derby, there is a place on the track for every body type! Don’t believe me? Come to a roller derby bout. We’ll show you with the big and the little can do!
I have a husband and kids; I don’t have time for this.
What is my family, chopped liver? Most of us have families, too. And with a family, comes a busy life… Roller derby can take as little as a few hours per week to several hours - depending on what you put into it. But, can you imagine how fulfilled your life would be if you had a hobby that made you feel good, your kids proud of their strong, empowered mommy and your husband gawk at your toner and firmer legs and bum?
How much does it cost to join?
Every roller girl plays monthly dues to play, and then there’s the upkeep of skates and safety gear… and don’t forget the cute booty shorts you’re going to want to match your uniform, and the stripped knee-high socks, and the fishnets, and… well, those last few are optional. But, yes, there are costs involved, but perhaps cutting back on your visits to the local pub or Coach Outlet will help out with that! The costs are far offset by the rewards of being in shape, helping give back to the community, entertaining thousands of fans, and relieving stress with 80 of your closest new friends! At the end of the day, it’s cheaper more rewarding than a gym membership, and we won’t make you pay when you stop playing!
I’m a business professional (or a teacher, or…), I can’t let it be known I play roller derby.
One of the entertaining aspects of roller derby that we kept with the new wave of this sport, is having derby names. This is not only just for fun, but also to protect the personal lives of the women involved. You don’t ever have to release your real name to your fans, and you certainly don’t have to be in the press if you don’t want to. We respect and honor skaters' privacy.
I work and go to school, no way I have time.
We strive to make derby achievable for even the busiest of women. We offer up to 7 practices a week, varying from week nights to weekend mornings and afternoons. I’m sure we can get derby to fit into your schedule. Just talk to us, and let us know what you’re schedule is, and we’ll let you know we have for you!
I don’t have the balls to play roller derby!
None of us girls have balls, silly! We just have determination and with the constant support of 80 other women (and thousands of friends, family and fans who want to see you succeed), we only seem like we have balls! Oh yeah, and there is no ball in roller derby!
